old baby. Please help me!!? I have a healthy baby, but breastfeeding has been extremely painful, coz of a chronic back condition, which I've had since years. Any stress makes me have severe pain and a huge swelling, with high fever. I know breastmilk is good, but I'm going crazy with stress. Am scared I'll become a nervous wreck. I keep crying the whole day. I want to stop breastfeeding him and want to wean him. PLEASE PLEASE dont jugge me. Please advice me on how to do it.... PLEASE HELP ME.....

First off are you weaning him because it hurts to hold him for long peroids of time or because the increased size of your breasts are making your back aches worse? If it is cuz it hurts to hold him to nurse for that long have you considered buying or renting a breast pump...the electric kind that way you can still provide him with breastmilk without having to hold him in the manner required to nurse. If it is cuz of the breast size then start weaning him onto formula not cows milk which isn't good for a child until at least one year of age. With my daughter I just started giving her less bresast milk and more formula each day, about an ounce at a time difference. Make sure you do it gradually otherwisse you may become very sore and your baby may become constipated. Before starting I would look at differnt types of formula to find one that baby likes. My daughter loved Infamil but wouldn't touch Similac at all so if I gave her it she would refuse...look into all the options and find one baby is okay with and doesn't constipate him...some hospitals give out samples of them, try your local hospital to see and let them know what you are trying to do, it would be cheaper to try this then buying a can of each brand. Good luck.

First of all -- don't get stressed. I am sure all those mothers out there will tell you -- we all went through it. Initially I had that problem too.

A good idea would be to lie down and feed your baby. Adjust with pillows for you and your baby so that you are comfortable. However, don't do it if you are likely to sleep off.

I would alternate with sitting on a straight backed chair and lie-down position. That way the back did not have too many stresses.

Secondly, ask your doctor to give you a good painkiller. Any good Ibuprofen helps.

The other reason why you are probably in pain is because your breasts are now pumping a lot of milk. This is when they become engorged and can also cause back pain, shivering and fever. Don't worry... this too will pass in 2-3 days. You could express or pump the excess milk.

Most importantly, practice deep breathing when you breastfeed your lil one. That helps you relax, will help your baby suckle more and will ease your problems.

They say the more you relax the better it is for your own and the baby's healthy development.

Take care and I shall pray for you.

You are not an awful mother; you are in severe pain. So much pain undermines your tolerance to stress. Stress is not healthy for you or the baby. Stress can lead to post partum depression. Don't let anyone make you feel guilty.

Please check with your doctor beore beginning any of these suggestions.

Several things will help your pain: Walking, gentle stretching, water exercise, massage, and alternating heat and ice packs. Some people get help from acupuncture or a chiropractor.

If the pain and stress do not subside, seek the help of a specialist.

Take a nap while the baby sleeps. Once a week, get a relative or adult sitter to stay with the baby for a few hours to give you some alone time. On the other days, get out of the house and take the baby for a walk in his/her carriage. the exercise will reduce your stress and give you time to bond alone with the baby. Inside the house, play soothing music and sing to the baby, play games like peek a boo, etc.

When holding the baby, sit in a chair with good, firm support. Put a bed pillow on your lap to raise the baby's face closer to you so you are not bent forward. Back pillows, for additional support, are sold in any medical supply store.

I understand your pain since I have spinal problems. After my son was born, I was in agony, and I did not breastfeed him. Between the c-section and the heavier breasts, I could not move my neck for alsmost two years. My back got so bad the doctor sent me to a pain clinic. My mom had to come and help with the baby once a week. Thank goodness, my son was an easy baby.

I did breastfeed my daughter, but I could only tolerate the back pain for a few months. The pain was so bad that I cold not drive for several months. I started to wean her at 3 months.

Weaning:

Buy a breast pump and express the milk for a few weeks. Use the formula or soy milk for feedings inbetween the breast milk. Gradually go onto all an formula diet for the baby.

Your breasts will be sore, but it's important not to breastfeed or express your milk after the baby is on the bottle full time. Warm baths help. Ice gel pack alleviate the soreness in the breasts. Wear a bra with good support. After you stop breastfeeding, Motrin or Advil will help the pain.

If your fever is 101 or higher and your breast is hard and red, you probably have an infection. See the doctor asap.

I wish you success in feeling better. The baby will thrive when you feel better.