Telesales Revenge


We've all been victims of holding on the phone as you have to punch in endless numbers which seem to plunge you into an automated phone system abyss. Well there might just be a way to cheat that endless holding. American, Paul English, has been tirelessly testing out ways to bamboozle these systems with these ingenious phone cheats!

The Guide on how to be a phone cheat in the UK

General cheats

These are cheats which often work if there isn't a specific cheat listed.

Press 0 (or 0# or #0 or 0* or *0) repeatedly, sometimes quickly. Many IVRs will connect to a human after a few "invalid entries", although some IVRs will hangup.

Say "get human" or "agent" or "representative" or shout your favourite four letter word! If these are not programmed, the IVR might again connect you to a human after a few of these "invalid entries".

Just hold, pretending you have only a rotary phone (the old fashioned one with a dial).

Connect to sales; they always seem to answer quickly, then have them transfer you to the department you need.

Specific UK cheats

Virgin Trains - 08457 222 333 - when the system starts simply say "AGENT" and it will put you through to an advisor.

Lloyds TSB Credit Cards - 0870 010 6622 - customer service line. When asked to say your 16 digit card number, just say "AGENT" as well, and you will go straight through.

Alliance and Leicester - press 0#0#0#0#0 repeatedly until you get a ringing tone.

Tesco - (0800 591 688) - when prompted to select an option - do NOT press anything - do this every time you get a prompt. The system will think you have an old fashioned rotary phone and take you straight through.

Currys - (08701 545 570) Press # - when told that option is not available press again. You may need to do this a few times.

PC World - main number is 08702 420 444 - press * then the 4 digit store number (which is on the top of your receipt) i.e. 4802 for Gloucester, then #, and you will get through to your chosen store.

BT - (0800 800 150) - Just press * whenever you get a prompt. Ignore the operator when it says that the shortcut is invalid and press again. This will take you straight through to a ringing tone and an operator.

Pesky Cold Caller Counter Script

Cold calls are one of the curses of the modern age. But now households are being encouraged to play call centres at their own game!

Dutch, conceptual artist Martijn Engelbregt from Amsterdam has devised a counter-script to tie up telesales staff and cut their companies' profits. He got the idea when a conversation with one salesman "got very personal and the guy told me how he didn't like his job and I talked to him for more than an hour, asking him questions".

The script has made Mr Engelbregt a hate figure in telemarketing circles. He said: "The reaction has been very strong. I have had salespeople saying I am stealing their jobs and threatening to call me 10 times a day in revenge".

His website, available in English and nine other languages, says the script starts by instructing the customer to ask, immediately after the caller's first question, 'to whom am I speaking?' Options of how to proceed depend on the answer given. The caller is asked to spell his name, whether this is his full-time job, how much he earns and if he gets time off for going to a dentist. Follow-ups include: 'Is it important to have good teeth for your job?' and 'Which toothpaste would you recommend?'

An estimated 1.5billion cold calls are made every year in Britain, many in the evening. It is against the law to call people who have indicated they do not want to receive unsolicited calls from firms by putting their name on a national register.

Do Not Call

To ensure that the pesky cold callers won't call you go to the following website

www.tpsonline.org.uk

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