I'm at my wits end, and could use some advice from older more experienced parents or grandparents out there. I have a 5 yr old son, and 8 yr old daughter. Lately they have started bickering, fighting, and hitting eachother. Frankly it's getting out of hand, and what ever I do they dont seem to listen or care. Often times they will get into these huge fights in their rooms-they have seperate rooms, but it doesnt seem to help. When they both come up to me, and acuse the other of hitting, kicking, biting, calling names-you name it. I have no idea who started it because their not doing it where I can see them. So then I'm confused on how to even handle the situation when I have no clue who hit,ect first. This is driving me crazzy, and I need to get a handle on it now. Shouldnt they be past this at their ages? How can I handle it? WE DO NOT HIT IN OUR HOME so we need a gentle approach. Besides I dont see justification in spanking, or hitting a child for punishment.Thanks!What really gets to me is the constant tattling. They constantly come up to me, and tell on the other. "mom sissy hit me" No "____ hit me first" So of course I tell the older one hitting back isnt ok either. But then I also want them to solve their own problems amongst them selves. Many of the fights could be settled between them by them without parent involvement. This is what gets me frustrated the most.

Equal punishment for both everytime!!They can sit on time-out seperately, and apologize to each other when time-out is over.Be consistant, and they will get sick of it in time.Good Luck.

Yea.....been through this many, many times with my kids and my daycare kids. We do not hit in our home either. We just used the same ole things we do for everything, and it really works for us; Time outs are a big thing, and then privledges(ALL) are taken away. Also for the day..the two fighting are 'joined at the hip' all day(except bathroom) and have to learn to get along!!!! You may have to do this the next few times that they fight, but be consistant with whatever you do, they'll get the picture and you will get your sanity back!! LOLGood Luck To YouMomma P

Sibling fighting is very normal...me and my sister was the same way.... just because one thought that mom or dad was giving the other more attention.

I think you should take away Tv and toys until they get it together.

Spanking or hitting a child only teaches them that it's okay to hit, so I would never suggest that. I hate to say it, but you have alot more to look forward to. I had two boys that were 18months apart, and they started bickering at about 5 or 6 years old. Now they are best friends and even share a place together. When I had this kind of problem, I would make them sit on the sofa together with their arms around each other for 10 minutes. That way I could watch them, and they were both feeling punished. One was punished for being guilty of the act, the other was punished for tattling. It seemed to work. Good Luck Sweetie! =)))

i don't have parenting experience butwait 8 n 5 thats normal if there both boyz

If you want them to learn how to work it out on their own, go to your local head start. Ask them for information on conflict resolution. It is one of the methods that they use with their children. It teaches the child to talk out their feelings and work together on a solution. You will have to mediate it for a while so they get the idea, but it can work if you stick to it and make them follow through on their plans. Trust me, they use this technique on 3-5 year olds in the program. It really reduces arguements and fights. It also helps a child express their feelings and ideas.

here is an idea that might help with the tattling. My sister did this with her 3 kids and her school kids (she is a teacher). If one tattles on the other, a paper donkey tail is taped to their backside that reads "I'm a Tattle Tail". Having to wear that around all day and out in public really stop the tattling. They didn't like having a tail on them.As far as anything else can't help you there, for I believe in a good swat on the backside.

i dont think you can stop that, your prob sounds just like my sister and meim 2 years younger than my sister and my mom would always be mad at us for fighting, its just what brothers and sisters donow that im older, my sister has 3 kids now around the same age and you just cant stop it and if you can that just wouldnt be normal, just let it ride, and use little white lies, say you have a camera set up in the house so you see everything, so if they started the fight youll find out, you just have to look at the video tape. lol other than that it all normal